An invitation to create your best life

Do you, like so many people, replay past events with regret?

It is tempting and easy to think about a decision you made, a conversation you had, a response made quickly, and wish it had been different.

When you feel the pull to question, reexamine, or suffer about things in the past, you cheat yourself.

How?

You cheat yourself out of being present now, and when that happens you lose precious opportunities to create what is possible in this moment.

What you are able to create in every moment (a new idea, a meaningful conversation, a new boundary, something you never dared to explore before) can actually shift your trajectory.

And that one small shift can lead you to a future that is more satisfying and fulfilling.

That’s an incredible possibility.

What are you creating now?

What are you thinking about and taking action on to create the life you truly want to live?

Are your thoughts and actions propelling you in a direction that excites you, or are they limiting you?

Perhaps you are dwelling on negativity and worry, which is common and may feel reasonable. A conscious shift to gratitude and positive possibility can bring inspiring energy to your next efforts.

Perhaps you feel unsure or timid. A shift to exploring with someone you trust can provide insight and inspiration to take a step you might otherwise not have tried.

Each moment of your day offers the opportunity to create a new thought, take a new step, be a bit bolder.

You may not have considered that these are acts of creation!

What happens when you consciously create 

When you create from a place of belief, clarity and trust, you can move ahead with optimism and willingness to experiment, knowing that you can continue to create in each moment.

When you try new things, course-correct if necessary, and create a new next step forward — over and over again — your life can change in remarkable ways.

This can become a new way of operating. A new way of living.

Take a small, meaningful step now

I invite you to make one small commitment to yourself today — to create something just beyond your habitual way of operating, or just outside of your comfort zone.

It may be to say “no,” if you know deep down that that response is called for.

It might be to say “yes” to your heart, if you feel it’s time to try something new.

And if that “something new” is to to say “yes” to you — to make space for yourself, to look deep into your heart and find true clarity about what you want, and to have a guide to begin creating that reality — you may want to say “yes!” to a once-a-year opportunity that’s just round the corner.

Start creating the future you dream of

Each spring I lead the Live Big Live! retreat in Boston, and this opportunity is only happening once in 2024.

On June 6, 7, and 8, 2024, an intimate group of incredible women — like you! — will come together to move though a life-changing experience together. And we start in a virtual format together before the retreat, so you will have a solid foundation for everything that happens in our beautiful space together.

Here’s what you can expect:

• You will be guided to crystalize a vision that is rooted in deeply knowing yourself.

• You will experience creativity in inspiring, fun, and surprising ways — and no special talent or experience is needed!

• You will receive tools to use, again and again, whenever you feel doubtful or stuck, to keep moving toward your dreams. 

• You will learn from and be supported by other great women, and in turn you will bring your gifts to them.

• You will create a concrete plan for how you will live into your vision for the next 90 days — so the inspiration and insights will be specifically actionable for you.

• You will amaze yourself and feel excited about your life as never before.

I have witnessed remarkable outcomes at Live Big Live! in the past, and it would be an honor to speak to you to see if this opportunity is a match for you.

My life’s work is to guide and inspire great women to tap all of their potential by activating the transformative power of creativity to live their best lives — to live big!

If you are ready to step into an amazing future, let’s talk soon. We kick off in advance of the retreat, so let’s get a date on the calendar soon! 

Schedule a call here. (There's never a cost or obligation for us to chat.)

Here are a few photos taken at past Live Big Live! retreats

Unleash your creative power in 2024

Imagine standing at a large glass window on a rocky shoreline, looking out at the vast ocean and the expansive sky above it. Close your eyes for a moment and imagine what that would look like and how that would feel.

Can you “see” the splendor of nature before you?

Can you sense the energy of the powerful moving water and hear the crashing waves on the rocks below the window? Can you see the graceful, swooping birds gliding on the wind currents?

This inspiring vista represents the year that lies ahead for you — an amazing year of limitless possibilities.

The vast space is filled with energy that you can tap into and use as fuel to create an incredible 2024!

The energy for creation is in you

The way that energy is generated and built in the natural world provides us with information we can apply in our lives, to create anything we want to bring into existence or elevate in our lives.

Here’s a bit of nerdy science to explain:

1. Just as in atomic structure, you can add energy to a stable system and create stability at a higher level. (With a hydrogen atom, for instance, you can add energy with a laser. The electron absorbs the energy and moves to a higher energy state. Got that?)

Interestingly, the process can go in the other direction. An electron at a higher level of energy can drop back down if its energy is dissipated or lost. It takes new energy to be put back in to get back up to the level it had.

2. Here’s another piece of information to consider, having to do with thermo-dynamics and entropy. (I promise, this will not hurt your brain!)

The fact is that the universe tends toward disorder, and that’s called entropy. If you let things erode, you need to put energy back into the system and then sustain that energy. You can even build more energy from there! 

We all know that nothing lasts forever, and our bodies, brains, even civilizations can crumble. The good news is that living things are designed to counter entropy!

3. Chemical reactions have something great to teach us. Activation energy is needed to bring several atoms together to make a molecule (think about 2 Hydrogen atoms and 1 Oxygen atom, to make water).

Any process that creates new things from already-existng things takes energy! (For water, a spark of heat or electricity does the trick.)

For us, it means not only having all of the parts ready and assembled, also adding an energetic ingredient.. 

What this means for you

When you:

• have the willingness to go beyond the edge of your comfort zone and trust yourself to do something that excites you

• believe that your desires and ideas matter, and that you have the power to take small steps forward

• commit to yourself and the effort that’s called for to create what you desire

• generate energy in your spirit and actions — a natural outgrowth of having the foundation I just described

• and stay in the process, so you continue to build energy, or start again when there is a setback

… you can create in limitless ways!

You can add spirit and emotion, too. While these are not as measurable, you can feel the energy of kindness, love, and joy. These all build positive emotional states.

Combine spirit and emotion with the scientific principles described above, you have powerful energy for fulfillment!

Let’s create a 2024 to remember!  

I kicked the year off leading a powerful new retreat last week, that was focused on the energy of creation (see some photos below!).

It was incredible, and I am designing more deep experiences for women to come together to get focused and clear, and generate creative energy to bring into their lives — and impact the world — as never before! 

And part of my focus for 2024 is to bring more of my work inside organizations. I support professional women to be able to bring more of their greatness forward, to have their biggest impact as they create lives they love. When this happens great culture is built, organizational success is accelerated, and great talent is retained.

If you want to hear more about any of what’s coming up — for you personally or your organization — get in touch!

The surprising way to be happier + boost creativity

Do you like getting messy?

Maybe it feels fun for you to make a mess in the kitchen, or in the garden, or with paints or clay.

Or, like me in years past, maybe the idea of things being messy makes you cringe.

The colors in my box of pencils needed to be neatly arranged according to the rainbow. A counter covered in spilled flour as I mixed up a batter drove me crazy. Precision and order made me super-happy.

How I learned to tolerate (and appreciate) a mess

I will never forget the day my coach and I were beginning a creative exercise and he dumped out the contents of my pristine box of 48 perfect new pastels.

Many of them broke. Dust was all over the place. The pastels were in a heap and I was furious.

He laughed.

I moved ahead with the process with gritted teeth. I hated that I could not choose each color from the box and return each to its precise place every time I used a color. 

And what happened next was wonderful.

With the irreparable heap in front of me, I slowly let myself connect to the music and simply play with colors — choosing a bright green on the fly, tossing it back on the pile, and picking up a rich blue that caught my eye. On I went, not pausing to put anything back in place. I focused on the combination of colors and shapes I was throwing together on the page.

It was not long before I totally forgot how irritated I’d felt. I was absorbed in a great process and felt free.

Having been forced to give up the control I was accustomed to, I got to feel what happened when I allowed myself to relax.

And I realized that in that new relaxed state, that many things had happened that would not have been the same had I been focused on keeping everything neat.

I was happy to start bringing that freedom into other parts of my life.

Why making a mess is good

While many of us feel it’s fine for kids to get messy, we fail to consider why it is healthy for us as adults to make a mess, too.

Engaging in messy play sparks our senses — no matter our age. 

Messy play opens avenues of curiosity, and creativity of every kind flows from there.

Allowing ourselves to be free opens our hearts and brightens our spirits. 

Spontaneity and surprise, and the “accidents” that show up in the process, bring things to light that would have never likely occurred otherwise. 

Rather than focusing on having to know it all or sticking to a plan, or keeping things neat and tidy, when you allow for some messiness — in both play and the ways you approach everything in your day — truly amazing things can happen. 

You are likely to spawn big new insights that can become the launch-point for exciting projects and initiatives.

And best of all, you will ignite your spirit.

How might you explore messiness?

If you have been holding on tightly, trying to keep everything under control and “just right”, maybe introducing a little messiness will enable you to loosen your grip a bit.

You might start with play, experience how that feels, and then introduce bits of serendipity into other part of your life. Meaningful surprises are likely to follow.

If you are looking for ideas, or want to share your experiences (positive or not) with messiness, I’d be happy to connect. Email me and let’s connect.

The magic I watched unfold

Have you witnessed magic lately?

I am delighted to say that I have.

Not only has it been magical to be in Paris for nearly 3 weeks, a few days ago I reveled in the joy of witnessing real magic unfold.

This is what I was privileged to see.

A group of remarkable women spent three days with me (virtually) at the winter Live Big Live! retreat, shaping their personal visions. Each faced the doubts and fears that cropped up for her, and each made concrete plans for how she will make her vision real.

The truly exciting thing was seeing how each woman found profound and deep insight about herself as we moved through the retreat.

Their discoveries not only helped them shape their visions clearly, they helped them commit to creating the futures they dream of.

Why the women came to Live Big Live!

Some of the women are launching new businesses, reshaping existing businesses, or envisioning new possibilities for their work. 

Some have recently embarked on a new professional journey. Some are focused on how they will simultaneously pursue two significant interests with ease.

All got clear about what they will do to propel their endeavors forward.

And excitingly, each is now aiming higher than she ever dared before, and each is excited to have a new level of impact.

This ambition is grounded in a solid foundation of belief in all that is possible.

And as each woman mapped out how she will actually make her vision real in the coming months, she was guided to focus on and value more than just her work.

Each is also considering the ways her relationships, her care for her physical health and well-being, attending to an environment that will support her, nurturing her spirit, and considering her legacy will help her enjoy the best quality of life.

The creation I saw unfold

All of the magic I witnessed at the retreat was fueled in significant ways as the women had a big creative experience each day.

(It’s likely, as a reader of my Big Ideas, that you are aware of how strongly I believe in the creative power we all possess, and that I advocate for both expressive creativity — think singing, drawing, writing and lots more — and appreciating and adopting the mindset of a creator.

With the mindset of a creator, you are able to create all day, every day. As you make each decision, and as you consider your response to each new possibility, challenge and opportunity, you stop reacting and are able to generate new ideas for what is possible.)

On each day of Live Big Live! I introduced a specific creative experience to support the focus of our day.

These experiences facilitated deep access to emotion, resulting in new insights and perspectives for all.

And the visual power of everything they expressed was remarkable!

Check out the images below to see some of what emerged.

What are you ready to create now?

If you are thinking about the truly fulfilling life you yearn to live — whether you have had a setback, are at a crossroads, yearn for something to change, or have a burning desire or dream you want to make real — let’s talk about it.

I believe in the power of a great conversation. I can share more about the ways Creative Core Coaching leverages the power of creation, and we can explore whether the next Live Big Live! (or other support) may be a good fit for you.

Whatever the outcome, I will be happy for us to connect. 

I invite you to email me, or find a date on my calendar.

Here are two wonderful collages (each with the front of the collage on the left and the back of the collage next to it), that were created at the Live Big Live retreat last week.

One word can impact your whole year — really!

Welcome 2023! Wishing you a happy, healthy, joyous new year.

In last week's post I shared my word-of-the-year process. If you chose a word for your year, this is the moment to start living it.

If you missed it, or have not yet chosen your word, it's not too late to use the process. Find a few minutes to sit quietly and choose a word to guide you for this year.

Your word can have more impact than a resolution

I have found this practice to go deeper and have much more impact on my life than making new year resolutions, which quickly fall to the wayside for most people. My clients have also chosen words to guide their years that have significantly impacted their lives.

In last week’s post I offered a list of questions to chose from to get you started, and the post includes a link to my streamlined process, too.

You can combine the approaches or stick to the simpler version.

I hope your word will be meaningful for you now, and throughout 2023.

Last week I also promised to share my word for 2023 with you.

My word for 2023

As you can see, in addition to selecting a word, I always add the specific ways I intend to live into my word.

By printing it out and pinning it were I see it each day, I stay inspired and clear about my intentions throughout the year. I invite you to do that, too.

My new year gift to you

When you have selected your word for 2023, I'd be happy to typeset it for you, as I do for mine each year. I will do this for the first 10 people who send me their word for 2023.

Simply email me, and if you are one of the first 10 responses I receive, I will send you a PDF that you can print out and hang where you will see it, and be inspired by it, each day.

I am eager to hear the word you choose to help make 2023 your best year ever.

Sending you wishes for a new year filled with creative energy to fuel abundant love, happiness, peace, and prosperity.

How to end the year with insight and inspiration

In the last few days of 2022, many people have time away from work. Some are focused on family, some share a string of holiday celebrations, some are on vacation.

Whether you are busy in any of these ways, or you are working through the holiday, this week is an ideal time to create space for reflection and dreaming.

Start with using the guide below to do a “year in review” of your life in 2022, then look ahead to 2023.

Give yourself the gift of time to reflect

Our days flow by, and as we move along we rarely pause to take in the bigger picture.

I made a date with myself this past weekend to get cozy, sit with my journal, and do some reflecting. With music playing and candles flickering, I posed a number of questions to myself and did a bit of writing about each if them.

Pick questions from these lists and see what happens for you. (You may want to print this out and have it next to you as you write.)

First, go through your calendar for the past year and ask these questions:

What were the key things that happened each month?

Are there themes or patterns that you notice?

What excited you? What highlights do you want to put a star next to?

If you were making a top-10 list of your year, what would you include?

Why was each item on your top-10 list so great or meaningful?

Continue to reflect with some or all of these questions: 

Where did you struggle last year?

What were your wisest decisions? Your lessons learned?

What new habits did you develop, or deepen?

What did you stop doing?

Who influenced you the most this year?

What was the biggest or most meaningful thing you completed?

What relationships did you start, or deepen, or release?

What was left unfinished this year?

How did you take care of yourself?

When were you courageous?

What are you ready to let go of now?

What are you most proud of? What can you celebrate? (Don’t overlook the small things!)

Can you find gratitude for all of it — the things that delighted you and things that challenged you — knowing that all of them have been meaningful?

Next, look ahead to the new year

You may want to pause after taking stock of the past year, and then start fresh (later, or the next day) and look ahead.

Consider these questions, and feel free to add any others that come to mind:

What would make 2023 a great year for you?

What intentions do you want to set now?

What will you say “yes” to, and what will you say “no” to?

What do you want more of this year? What do you want less of?

What will you explore?

How will you invest in yourself?

How will you express yourself?

What will you create?

What new declaration are you ready to make now?

Then, choose a word to guide your new year

I have been choosing a word-of-the-year for a long time, using a short practice I have shared in the past. I am glad to share it again, as I’ve just returned to the process before embarking on 2023.

As you will see in this word-of-the-year post, that I wrote in 2018, I propose that you start by answering a short list of questions. They are similar to the longer list I shared above.

Whichever questions you use, your answers will prepare you to follow my process — and reading the examples I've shared in the post may help you consider the word that fits best for you now.

I will share my word for 2023 with you soon, and would be happy for you to share the word of the year you choose for yourself. Simply send me an email.

Until we connect next week, at the start of a fresh new year filled with wonderful possibilities, I’m sending wishes to you for abundant health, happiness, creativity and love.

Sure you feed your body. How about your soul?

Here is a pair of questions you may not have been asked before — and maybe never asked yourself:

“How do you feed your soul?” and, “Do you feed your soul?”

While I do not recall having explicitly asked myself these questions, I had an experience this past weekend that fed my soul in such a deep way that these questions showed up. I am moved to bring them to your attention.

What our bodies and hearts need

If you have been reading my Big Ideas for some time, you know I believe that living in high gear, rushing and pushing and striving, robs us of the overall wellbeing we need and deserve.

We can create space in our lives to support our bodies. We can get ample rest, make time to eat healthy food, and devote time to build strength and flexibility for physical ease.

We can honor and nurture important relationships.

And we can create space to pause, reflect, and listen to our hearts.

This last practice (which can be cultivated in a range of ways) enables us to create with intention rather than being in perpetual motion without clarity — and can save us from reacting on the fly as we rush off to attend to the next thing on a jam-packed calendar.

We can lay a foundation for living a good life by bringing all of this awareness to the front of our minds and adjusting our ways of living. For many accomplished women, it takes time and support to test and integrate these practices. (It certainly did for me.)

And, alongside the attention and commitment we can each make to bring new ways of being into our daily lives, there is a deeper level of wellbeing and expansion that’s available for us to explore.

Take a moment to consider your spirit

Whether you prefer thinking about it as your soul, or your spirit, or the deepest longings in your heart, I invite you to bring a bit of curiosity and exploration to what you desire at that level.

In the midst of a busy life, it is easy to miss those messages, or push them off to the side.

Some of us look for those messages and simply cannot find them.

Some are afraid to even look, or do not know where or how to start.

Maybe you are keenly aware of your deep desires. For many of us, stillness and patience (and often help) are needed to make those discoveries.

It is then that we can consider how to honor our deep desires.

Our souls crave nourishment

Over the years, I have seen many ways that women have lost a connection to the deep desires of their souls.

Some have set aside the joy of playing an instrument, or spending time in nature, or working with their hands, or another soul-rewarding practice — often for many years.

Some have let a meaningful part of themselves sit fallow as they pursued a career and nurtured a family.

Some, like me, lacked the belief that it was possible — not to mention feeling I could be “good enough,” — to create. (In my case it was as an artist.) We never dared to even try.

When things like this happen our souls, our spirits, our hearts are robbed of life-enhancing nourishment.

Yet it’s possible return to what we have set aside, or embark on new adventures. We can seek satisfaction as we enter and explore new terrain.

I am living proof that amazing things are possible when you allow yourself to follow the small whisper, or the shout, that you tune into.

My experience may inspire you

I took my first painting class in 2015. Yes, even with a BFA I had never painted. I had stuck to design-related classes, never daring to even enter a painting studio.

And despite my long-standing fear, and feeling that it might be a disaster to try, I knew a part of me yearned to have the experience of painting. I finally decided I would take a painting class and see what happens.

And thus an incredible journey began. It has been one of the most rewarding adventures in my life.

(You can see my paintings here.)

And recently, something new showed up for me.

A marvelous new client in my coaching program teaches writing. And she invited me to participate in a retreat she leads. This new possibility intrigued me, even as it scared me.

I love writing my weekly articles, and I loved writing my book. But this teacher focuses on “writing from the deep voice.” This is creative writing, and the idea of attending her weekend retreat with women who have been honing their crafts with her for some time, made me question if I could possibly do that.

I thought it was likely that, as a rank beginner, I’d not only embarrass myself, I might be mortified.

And yet, I said, “Yes.”

I chose to let myself be a beginner, to be taught and led and inspired. I realized that I’d only know how it would feel or what would happen if I gave it a try. Maybe it would be terrible, or uninteresting, or not a fit for me, and any of that would be fine.

This is what happened.

By saying, “Yes,” I gave a gift to my soul. My soul, that goes to deep places when I paint, loved this new experience.

I let go of self-judgement or caring what anyone else thought of my work and was fully absorbed in the process, step by step by step. One piece of writing after another, reading what I wrote and hearing others read their creations, I was palpably moved and inspired.

I discovered that there is a vast new, satisfying, exciting way to nourish my soul! I am filled with gratitude and joy.

Your soul has yearnings, too

We all have layers of desire waiting to be discovered in deep places.

With guidance and patience and practice, you can access your inner voice with more ease. And you can explore new avenues of expressing it with greater ease, too — whether or not you ever pick up a paintbrush or try your hand at creative writing.

The pace will be different for each of us. The rewards — that I have experienced, and that I been honored to usher in and witness for my clients — are always remarkable.

I invite you to take a new step towards creating a truly rewarding future today.

And I’d be delighted to hear about the deep yearnings in your soul. If you’d like to share them simply email me. (And if the writing experience sounds intriguing, I’ll be happy to introduce you to my writing teacher.)

How to connect to your magic and light up your life

Something interesting happens when I mention the title of my book, Live Big: A Manifesto for a Creative Life in a conversation with someone I have just met.

More often than not, people look me in the eye and say, “Oh, I'm not creative.”

I am on a mission to dispel that common belief.

I want to help people understand, and experience, that they are filled with creativity. I also want them to know how powerful their creativity is.

We all came into the world filled with creativity

Yes, creativity is in all of us. It’s a kind of magic we all possess.

When we are small, and given some crayons and paper, we do not fret at a blank page. We do not worry about what to draw. We pick up a color that appeals to us and start making marks.

When I observe my 3-year-old granddaughter as she draws, and ask what she’s drawing, she tells me incredible stories about the scenes (that look to me like excited scribbles).

Whether she is serious and focused, or laughing, she is fully engaged in expressing herself. And it is clear that she loves it.

When we, as adults, tap that creative energy — or expand and accelerate it, for those who do feel creative — we give ourselves a huge gift. We connect to the magic inside.

Creating is not just for “special people”

The opportunities to create are vast.

While many feel intimidated because they think they are not “talented”, I’m here to bust that myth. You do not need to be a virtuoso musician, a great actor, a brilliant writer, or a gifted dancer to create!

All forms of self-expression are terrific.

Do you love to putter in a garden or build in a workshop? Do you like to cook or make things with your hands? Are you a visionary thinker, or love embarking on adventures to explore in nature? Do you like to play with paint or clay?

Any and all of these ways of creating are fantastic.

What happens when you create

When you create in any way with a feeling of curiosity and freedom, when you are able to to play and be surprised, you connect to your desire and something incredible happens.

Your spirit opens.

You get out of your head (where most of us spend most of our time) and connect to your heart and your intuition.

And you make discoveries.

The discovery may be about new ways to produce a result that pleases you. Or you may discover that something you thought you’d enjoy was not that great, and move on to new ways to explore.

The most important discovery?

Connecting to new parts of yourself and experiencing more of who you are.

And when that happens, your expanded, lit-up spirit can show up in other parts of your life.

I witness this phenomenon all the time with my clients. They show up differently at work, and great things happen. They navigate relationships with more insight and less reactivity. They look and feel alive in remarkable ways!

I rejoice with them as they open to and share more and more of their greatness.

You can start today

I invite you to do one thing (or one new thing) today to express yourself.

It may be simple and you may do it for a mere few minutes, but choose one thing and go for it.

Maybe you will share it, or you may choose to have a private experience. Maybe it will be exciting, or comfortable, or perhaps it will feel awkward.

In any case, take a moment to think about how it felt to create.

Consider how it felt to experiment with new flavors rather than following a recipe. Or put a small arrangement of objects on a shelf in a pleasing way. Or pull out an instrument you haven’t played in ages, and your response to the sounds you made.

Then commit to creating in some way again tomorrow.

In time, you will not have to plan to create. You will find your creative spirit showing up all over the place!

The more that you create in these ways, the more you will come to understand the power of creativity to support you to show up fully. In time, this expansive magical feeling can be a regular part of your daily experience.

And it is a game-changer to show up fully in the world.

Do it for yourself, and do it for all of us. We need the gifts, the fully expressed genius, that only you can contribute.

Imagine the impact we will have when we all live big.

(I would be delighted for you to share the ways you love to create, and new ways you bring creativity into your life. And please share the impact it has for you. Leave a comment or email me.)

What transformation looks like in real time

Can you recall witnessing magic? Not a magician performing elegant tricks — actual magic. I had that experience last week.

I witnessed the magic of seeing lives transforming in front of me over three days.

There was no sleight of hand — this was true transformation.

The transformation was powered by deep personal exploration and creative expression. Love and trust provided the engine.

All of this happened at the Fall Live Big Live! retreat that I was honored to lead. I want to share this experience, because the event offers insights for all of us.

Transformation requires the right conditions

We did not show up on Day 1 of the retreat and dive right in. The women in the program had a foundation of preparation over a number of weeks, that primed them to make personal discoveries and thus be prepared for the processes they would move through at the retreat.

They had support and guidance along the way. Most of all there was an abundance of love and trust and generosity in this group, as everyone progressed to make her own discoveries and declarations.

The remarkable women who embarked on our journey were willing to show up in the preparation period, and then devote three days to go deep together. Some traveled to be there. Some arranged and rearranged their schedules to make it happen.

They arrived prepared to define a clear vision for what matters to them in the next part of their lives.

This is what mattered for these women

What matters most for one woman entails showing up fully and openly, with confidence in what she has to say and with belief in her potential to influence direction within her organization.

For another it means launching a new business — fleshing out the offering and stepping into making it a reality.

For one it means getting clear on her priorities and what to focus on and pursue in a portfolio of varied work arenas.

For one it means getting support and focusing in on the best way to manage a successful career and business that is fraught with stress, so she can keep clear of sacrificing her happiness and physical wellbeing.

For all it entails putting themselves at the center of the equation, as they focus on relationships, their health and wellbeing, and honoring their spirits.

Each woman looked with a sharp eye at the challenges she grapples with. Each dove into how to keep from being tripped up by limiting stories and beliefs. Each now has true belief in what is possible, and that belief is built on a solid foundation of self-love.

And they each committed to defining the specific ways they will live in the next 90 days to make their visions a reality.

They left the retreat with a plan and a full heart ready to live into the plan.

Transformation is not magic

Just as a caterpillar does not magically become a butterfly, the transformations I witnessed did not happen with a wave of a magic wand.

Caterpillar actually develop a chrysalis — a shell inside of which each caterpillar dissolves into a liquid mass. That is the material from which they start to construct each body part of the eventual butterfly they will become in the process of metamorphosis.

When ready, the formed butterfly cracks through the shell of the chrysalis to unfurl its wings and fly.

The women at the Live Big Live! retreat went through a stage of breaking down the old parts of themselves they no longer want and need.

They focused on the attributes they want to carry forward and amplify, and the aspirations they claim.

They committed to a vision of the women they each want to become, and what that will mean for each of them. I witnessed them feeling ready to soar!

The process felt magical — to them, and to me as I saw it unfold — even as the process was based on a carefully constructed methodology.

In their own words

Here are a few remarks that were made at the end of the retreat.

“You helped me work through so much. It was such a joy to be the recipient of what you created.”

“I needed the encouragement you gave me! I felt loved by you and the entire group.”

“Your quiet and powerful leadership, that came from a place of relaxed, deeply felt love, pulled me through my stress to a place of focus and clarity.”

”How special to be in a room full of wonderfully powerful leaders.”

Scroll down to see some of the final creative pieces that express the insights of the retreat experience for these women. (The collages were made on the last afternoon of the retreat.)

Questions to ask yourself now

What do you want, that will make the next part of your life truly fulfilling? Maybe an answer will pop quickly to mind. Maybe you are unsure about what you truly desire.

What limits you? Do you lack confidence? Are you afraid to be fully and authentically yourself? Maybe you have a vision that is smaller than what you truly yearn for.

I invite you to honor yourself and tap the desire in your heart. Or, if that desire feels elusive, to take steps to discover it.

Most of all, I invite you to feel deserving of your best possible life.

And if you may want a guide to help you make a faster and easier transformation, I would be glad to explore these questions with you.

We can talk, and if the next Live Big Live! program might be a fit for you, we can explore that together.

Finding the magic of motivation

Sometimes things are hard. We find ourselves facing obstacles. We hit setbacks. We need to cope with stress or illness.

And sometimes things feel hard when we really want something and are on our way to achieving it.

Here’s an example that may remind you of an experience in your life.

I am working with a client who is launching a new website for a business she is reviving after life events diverted her for a few years. It had been a successful business, and she feels ready and eager to resume it.

In fact, she has inventory waiting to sell again, and she has new offerings ready to produce.

She has already invested in having a great web developer build a new site. It looks fabulous and will make online selling a breeze.

And yet, she is struggling.

Why? Because she’s scared.

Her thoughts are consumed with questions like these:

What if the business doesn’t take off? What if the business does take off and makes her busier than she thinks she can handle? What if the new technology will feel burdensome to learn?

At the moment, one very small thing is holding her back — writing the About page copy for the site. It feels so hard for her — not because it’s difficult to string some words together for an initial rough draft. It’s the fear and doubt she is wrestling with that is holding her back and delaying the launch of the new site.

When we want something and still struggle, we need to find (or re-find) motivation.

Motivation is the driving force for everything you aim to achieve

Motivation is easiest to come by when things you do excite you and when things are humming along. But as we saw in the story I shared, motivation is not a sure thing.

And motivation can feel elusive at times when you most need it — like when fear grips you, or deadlines are looming and you have procrastinated, or when you lack confidence in your ability to start or bring a project to conclusion.

Happily, getting motivated is a great way to get going on something that matters to you, to deal with setbacks, to move forward in spite of fear, to persevere, to set priorities, to perform well and build confidence, and to stay committed to the outcome you desire.

So how can you get into the flow of motivation when you need it?

5 steps to create and sustain motivation

1. Ask “why?”

Why this project, or this conversation, or this goal?

Just like my post last week explained that having clarity about the “why” is important to build momentum, getting clear about your “why” is crucial for finding motivation when it is missing.

The “why” may be a personal desire (like my client who wants to restart her business), or may be related to a less-appealing but none-the-less important obligation (like bringing a legal matter to a close). When you focus on the reason this matters, you can connect to motivation.

(And, if the “why” turns out to be that you took on something based on a feeling of obligation, or to please someone, or another reason that you realize is not important enough to you to see the thing though, this is the time to make a change in plans.)

With a compelling “why”, continue on to step 2.

2. Ask yourself, “How can I make the most of this moment?”

What small step can you take to move forward now?

What can the next step be?

Keep asking and keep going (even if it’s slow going at first).

And be willing to change things up and try new approaches along the way.

3. Get support

You don’t have to figure everything out on your own!

Think about who you can reach out to to provide input. Who can offer encouragement? Who might be an accountability partner, or be available to hold you accountable, so you can more easily continue to move ahead?

4. Get excited about the possibilities

Visualize the completion of the process. In the case of my client, she is envisioning seeing orders come in and joyfully sending off her delightful products to people who will enjoy them.

If the task is less pleasant, envision it being settled or complete, and off of your mind.

By foreseeing the best possible outcome, you will bring the most positive energy to the effort. There is always a wealth of possibility to be considered when your thinking is not colored by fear and resistance.

Not only will you feel motivated, you will be more creative and resourceful as you proceed.

And no matter the final result, you will know you gave the project your best effort.

5. Reward yourself

You can reward yourself along the way, to mark small steps forward and for persevering when things feel particularly challenging.

You can reward yourself for building skills and gaining confidence.

And certainly celebrate and reward yourself for reaching milestones, and the completion of your process.

Rather than minimizing your accomplishments, or rushing on to focus on the next things on your list, savor and celebrate what you have done!

What are you motivated to create today?

Perhaps you will create a new step forward toward a goal you have been pursuing or to propel a meaningful project.

You may create a new idea or implement a new approach for something already underway, or you may initiate something completely new and meaningful.

Connect to what matters to you and invite motivation to support you to putting your desire into motion.

Every day offers immense opportunities. Motivation carries you to rewarding outcomes.

Got momentum?

Sometimes things feel like they are flowing easily (maybe even effortlessly). Maybe you are experiencing delightful flow in your life, or as you work on a project, or as you generate new ideas.

And starting or advancing some things may feel sluggish, or you may feel stuck. Frustration, doubt and even fear can show up, which only leads to more difficulty when you want to move ahead.

The key to getting into flow — and sustaining flow — is momentum.

The magic of momentum

Before we look at how amazing momentum can be in your life, let’s get clear about what it really is.

Understanding momentum

I don’t know about my readers who are scientists and more left-brained than I am, but I expect I’m not alone in recollecting that high school physics was not a favorite subject.

Yet physics has a lot to offer us outside the lab, and momentum is a great and useful concept that can support us to live our best lives.

Momentum is defined as the amount of motion occurring in something that is moving, or the force that drives something forward to keep it moving.

While you can think about how quickly a car moves down a hill (which is likely to have been discussed in your physics classes), consider the concept of momentum in terms of the energy you bring to everything you do.

Who does not want to have more momentum to make things move forward with ease?

My guess is that we all want momentum, and lots of it.

How to build momentum — whether you feel stuck or sluggish

When you yearn for flow, the key to getting momentum underway is to be in motion.

Getting back to my memories of physics class: If there is no velocity there can not be momentum.

Now this is where things get subtle. Velocity means rapid motion, speed. And that's a great thing to aim for.

But to get from not being in motion (stuck) to building momentum, you need to begin moving.

And for those times when you are in motion but feel like you are far from flow, you want to be able to get more movement underway to build momentum.

How? Inspiration can give you the boost you desire.

How to get inspired

To generate inspiration when you want to get started or ward off sluggishness — whether you want to create new habits for a life that is not overwrought; or want to enhance your health by eating more fresh foods and getting more active; or you want to launch a new initiative in your work — ask yourself why this matters to you.

Having a strong WHY is a key way to get and stay inspired.

To get clear about your WHY, do some writing about it. Dig into all the reasons this thing matters to you. Make a list of what you bring to light, and keep that list handy for times when you need a boost to sustain your inspiration.

And then take action.

Whether you start with small steps (which is fine!) or you choose to take some bigger action steps at first, you’ll begin to be in motion or accelerate the pace you had before!

How to keep momentum growing

Hooray! You are in action. Or you have propelled yourself into feeling more energized, inspired and taking more action.

Getting into motion is crucial, but it’s easy to slack off without some strategies to help you.

This is the time to build velocity, so your momentum can not only be sustained, but grow for the duration of the project at hand.

Here are some things to keep in mind that will help you:

1. Stay focused and positive.
   Keep your attention on what you are aiming for and why it is important to you. Surround yourself with positive people. Don’t get discouraged when you hit a snag (after all, setbacks are inevitable). Positive energy helps you build and sustain momentum!

2. Be flexible.
   As you review your progress, be open to new approaches, new ideas, and make smart adjustments to the original plan you had in mind. Consider inviting others to help and support you, too. Maybe you will ask someone to be an accountability partner.

3. Celebrate yourself.
   Take note of each small success and acknowledge yourself for staying committed and building momentum. This practice goes a long way to keeping you moving ahead.

The more momentum you build the better everything gets

Positive energy you bring to one thing is certain to spread more generally. That’s how building momentum in one area of your life will impact all of your life.

The potential to build momentum is available to all of us, and is truly exciting.

Where can you focus on building momentum today?

Start where you are now and see what happens.

Live Big Live! is back — is it right for you?

I am frequently in conversation with accomplished women — women who are admired, have done great things, and often seem to have it all going for them.

When they share their biggest wish with me, it's to make the next part of their lives truly fulfilling.

They often describe themselves as living life in overdrive. Many feel unclear, stuck, or question themselves about what's possible for their future.

Whether they are at a crossroads, thinking about what is next, or know there is something more that’s possible for them — related to their professional direction, their personal life, or a combination — many know it’s time for this tension to be addressed.

They want to get on track, take action that is intentional, and move forward in their lives with confidence and enthusiasm — to be able to plug a great destination into their GPS.

As we can all agree, every new thing needs to be created. So to achieve our goals, each of us needs to focus on what we need to create to get the fulfillment we yearn for.

It’s easy to feel alone with our questions

Have you heard the phrase, “You can’t read the label when you are inside the jar”?

It is a great catchphrase to express how hard it is to identify, much less solve, your own problems because you are so very close to them.

Yet asking for help does not come easily for many accomplished women. (Years back, I was a textbook example of that resistance!)

What I know is that when we struggle on our own, we prolong dissatisfaction, frustration and stress.

It does not have to be that way.

What if you chose to be supported?

Rather than spinning your wheels you can choose to be guided and receive support to create your path toward fulfillment and start moving along it.

You can not only be guided, you can also travel with a small group of other amazing women, each there for her own growth and eager to support the other women in the cohort.

This is what that loving support looks like.

Live Big Live! is designed for big results

I carefully designed the Live Big Live! program to guide you to clarity, to help you set clear intentions, and to start creating the fulfilled life you dream of.

And it is designed to bring dynamic results to your life in a short time.

Live Big Live! is a proven program

Offered just 3 times each year, 6 groups of women have already moved through the Live Big Live! program and the outcomes have been remarkable.

The women gave themselves the gift of focused time to bring their true desires and concerns into the light, and to envision the futures they wanted.

They were guided to tap the clarity inside them with subtly powerful tools, in an inspiring process that unfolded organically.

They gathered at a retreat for 3 incredible days of exploration, discovery and creation.

And, each completed the program with a concrete plan to live into the vision for the future that she shaped.

(We have all experienced the high of feeling inspired and then having it quickly fizzle out when real life takes over. Live Big Live! is designed to have lasting impact.)

Each Live Big Live! participant has reported deep, meaningful, lasting change in her life. The women have amazed themselves at all they have created, and are delighted about the fulfillment they are experiencing.

I invite you to learn more and explore this opportunity

The Fall Live Big Live! program launches soon.

Some past participants are returning, and there is space for 6 new women to join us. We are excited to engage in this experience with the fresh energy that new people will bring!

Whether you are unsure of your next big step, or have a direction in mind and do not know how to start moving toward it, or you have been trying to move ahead and not progressing as you wish, Live Big Live! is meant for you.

And, it has to be the right fit for both of us. We can discover that in a conversation.

If you are ready for more insight, ready to free your spirit and expand the joy in your life, and ready to learn how to open the creative power that is waiting inside you so you learn to find your answers and take clear action, I invite you to schedule a call with me soon.

There’s no obligation — just an opportunity for you to share what’s going on in your life, and for me to share insights and perspectives that may help you.

Whether or not Live Big Live! turns out to be a fit for both of us, we will have a great conversation.

My wish is to help you set your GPS to a truly fulfilling destination, and to move along your path with joy.

Here’s how to schedule our call:

LiveBigCall.com

Let’s take these 3 steps together

I hope your holiday weekend was a happy one.

Perhaps, like me, you spent time with people you love, and yet your feelings about celebrating our country’s independence felt more sober this year.

Did you, too, find yourself reflecting on the meaning of independence and freedom with a heavy heart?

I have written about our relationship to freedom before. You may want to read How free do you feel?, that I wrote in July 2021. And 2 years ago my topic was Is your definition of freedom too small?

We cannot take freedom for granted

Freedoms that many of us long took as a given are now gone, and more are in danger.

This can make us feel powerless — a subject I wrote about last week. I included a list of ways we can each use our power now, that you may want to look over.

I believe that taking action is the path to the changes so many of us want to see.

Where and how to start

1. Begin with awareness of your energy

Taking meaningful action begins with our state of mind. Positive thoughts lead to positive outcomes — and, yes, sustaining positive thoughts can feel challenging in times like these.

I invite you to consider the energy you cultivate and bring to your days. As my mentor often reminds me, the energy from which you create (anything) impacts the outcomes you experience.

Practices like these will support you to sustain positive energy, and will impact everything you do.

• Start (or expand) a daily gratitude practice.

• Get ample rest and nourish your body.

• Focus on love. Embrace kindness and compassion.

• Spend time outdoors. Nature is a natural healer.

• Look for wonder all around you. (It’s always there!)

• Notice if you slip into negativity and actively reframe your thoughts.

Positive energy generates more positive energy! The people around you will feel it, and be attracted to it, and a great expanding cycle is set in motion.

2. Consider the people with whom you spend time

We are social creatures, and the people with whom we spend time have a great influence on our state of mind.

Are you surrounding yourself with, or tolerating, people who are bitter, angry, or dour?

Do you actively choose to be with people who are uplifting and inspiring?

When you choose to surround yourself with people who exude positive energy, who are creative thinkers, and who look for opportunities to take meaningful action that aligns with your values, you boost your energy. And, you amplify the impact of your shared efforts, which in turn engages more like-minded people.

And while many of us must interact with people who see the world through a negative filter, appreciate that those interactions can be managed with careful thought and by setting healthy boundaries.

3. Lead the way

Most of us are inclined to sit back and wait for others to lead us.

I believe we all have the opportunity to be leaders now.

Some people will organize efforts on a grand scale, and that is great. We benefit when individuals and organizations bring people and resources together to create collective action at scale.

We can contribute to those large efforts. Each person who shows up to march, writes a check, makes a call, or writes a postcard adds to the positive outcomes that are possible.

And consider this.

Many people fail to appreciate that all of us can take action to lead in small and powerful ways — each day.

In our conversations, in speaking up when we might typically stay silent, in inviting people to be engaged and collaborate, we have power.

Stepping into your power and speaking your truth are key ways you Live Big. The more you do it, the more natural it becomes to live and lead that way.

Please join me

I believe that in this moment we are being called to use our power to restore and expand liberty.

While it will take time and commitment, we can build a society that is just for all, where all can exercise freedom.

Let’s be creators of change and lead together.

Are you missing the magic?

Have you ever stopped to consider what it’s like to go it alone, compared to traveling through challenges with others

There are many reasons we opt to venture on our own, when having support around us can make things easier.

Some of us take pride in the satisfaction of doing things by ourselves. Some of us resist asking for help, thinking it shows we are not capable on our own. Or we feel we should do things on our own. Others feel doing things their way is always the best way.

For many years I never asked for help. All of the reasons noted above played into my insistence on doing things myself.

What happens when you have help and support

What I have learned time and again, is that we are all stronger, and benefit in countless ways, when we seek out and surround ourselves with loving help.

The coaches, the healers, and the network of fellow travellers with whom I have ventured in recent years have had an enormous influence on the quality of my life, the work I do, and the pace at which I have been able to make great changes.

And last week I witnessed the power of a group in a remarkable way.

This is what happened

Seven exceptional women joined me for the 3-day Live Big Live! spring retreat, that concluded on Saturday.

Each of these women is accomplished. They are leaders. They impact the world with the work they do.

And they — and I — experienced the great results of having the support of a wonderful group, rather than being a solo traveler through life.

This is what it looked liked.

Each woman was guided to go deep into her heart to gain clarity about her vision for the months and year ahead; to identify what limits her and learn to overcome old stories and habits; and to make a plan for how she will live into her vision. This journey is richly rewarding, but it can bring up complex emotions.

As everyone moved through a series of exercises to explore, and then articulate and creatively express the components of their visions and plans, there was laughter, and there were also some tears.

And there was a lot of sharing.

Over and over, someone in the group spoke about something, or affirmed something for someone else, that proved to be enlightening or inspirational for others around her.

Rather than feeling “alone” with an issue, it was comforting to know that the lack of clarity, or flagging confidence, or stubborn old story that’s been a hindrance, is something that others like her experience.

And sometimes a woman asked the perfect question, or had lessons or perspectives to share about working through specific issues, that proved to be just what someone else needed to hear.

When we travel together through sensitive terrain, we learn so much from one another, and others learn from us.

We also inspire one another — everyone benefits as awareness and resolve and clear expression emerge!

And as the leader of the retreat, I was able to connect many “dots” that were offered by the group, that expanded on what I know and what I teach.

All of us felt immense appreciation for the tangible magic that filled the room. By allowing ourselves to be fully present and generously open, we created the ideal conditions for profound outcomes to emerge for all.

(I hope you enjoy a glimpse of the retreat in the photos below.)

What support will you choose?

Rather than going it alone, you can have loving support to transform the life you are living today.

I would be happy to talk about the dreams you have, what gets in the way, and what is possible for you.

My help may be a fit for you, or I may have a recommendation to offer you.

It would be my pleasure to help you sort things out, so you are not alone as you begin to bring the change you yearn for into your life. Email me and we can make a date.

Until next week, stay safe and well, and create your life with joy. (And

3 easy ways to create more space in your life

I have been writing a new talk for weeks, that I presented for the first time last Tuesday. It was wonderful to share something new with the attendees of Lexington Wealth Management’s Empower Women series.

The title of my latest talk is: Live Big Without Sacrifice

As I have observed the lives of women (and men) around me, have heard from my clients, have reflected on the culture that surrounds us all, and focused on my own life, it is clear how many of us sacrifice our physical and mental wellbeing each day. The degree of sacrifice varies, but those sacrifices take a toll.

Now this is a big topic, and my talk offers major themes that may not be top-of-mind for most. But I want to share a fundamental truth (one that you may be familiar with if you have read my book) that I hope will help you today.

We need to create more time to simply BE

When we make space to BE more, we not only rest and care for ourselves, we are able to consider what really matters to us.

This space allows us to get clear about what we want to DO, and gain more insight into how we want to do those things.

As I say in my book, Live Big, we are human beings, but most of us spend most of our time doing. I invite you to focus on BEING before DOING.

And all of the ways of being that we choose to make our focus will create a foundation for the quality of our lives.

Let’s consider the most basic matter:

How to create space for more BEING

As I write today, I am away, with time to rest and reflect after a busy start of the year. Vacations are great — but they are not the answer.

The challenge (and imperative) is to focus on how to BE more in the midst of a busy life.

I invite you to explore these 3 ideas:

1. Commit to a morning practice

The form and duration of your morning practice is a personal choice.

It may include stretching or yoga, going for a run, or some other exercise. It may include journaling. It may include meditation. It may be structured so there is no screen time or listening to news before you get outside and breath fresh air.

One part of my daily practice is to pull a card from an oracle deck and use that as a prompt for journaling, reflecting, and setting intentions for my day.

If the idea of a morning practice is new to you, why not experiment and find what you like best?

2. Schedule breaks in your day

How many times have you plowed through your day, grabbed lunch on the go, and barely had time to think of anything other than the pressing items on your to-do list?

This a sure path to burnout! Why not make one or more of these ideas a regular part of each day?

• Take a “sacred pause.” Simply find a quiet place, set your clock for 2 minutes, close your eyes, and breathe quietly. (That’s it!)

• Make time to digest a healthy meal and bring your attention to the present. Chew your food slowly, savor the flavors and textures. You might sit in stillness or share a pleasant conversation.

• Chose to sit and do nothing! It could be to sit on a bench where you can watch people go by. Maybe you will look out a window at the sky or vista. Any form of doing nothing — for 5 or 10 minutes (or longer) will make a big difference in your wellbeing.

• Do a little moving. Walk around the block. Use the stairs instead of taking an escalator. Stand and stretch out your achy muscles after sitting in a meeting or being stuck at your desk. Your body will thank you!

3. Seek out inspiration and delight

This idea is the icing on the cake — and might be combined with things you choose in the two categories above, or something you do in another way.

When you look for wonder in your midst, or seek out beauty with intention, you light up your spirit and open your heart.

You might take a mid-day walk and use the camera on your phone to capture moments of natural beauty, or snap a photo of a curious color combination or an interesting light pattern. Or, look around you indoors and see where there are moments of delight you can savor.

You might schedule a date with yourself or a friend to visit a gallery, or go into a lovely shop you spotted as you drove past.

Any form of inspiration will bring positive energy into your life.

Why not start today?

I hope you will join me and commit to regularly giving yourself the space and grace to BE more — especially in the midst of a life that feels busy.

Small practices that create more space for you can have a surprisingly big impact.

Please share what you try and what you experience. Let’s stay inspired together!

Stay safe and well, and create your life with joy.

How to make each day a little easier

When people ask how you are, is your answer usually, “Busy!”? You may use other expressions that convey there's a lot — maybe too much — going on.

Maybe you live in over-drive, like so many accomplished professionals I know and speak to. Some wear their fast-paced, often stress-filled striving like a badge of honor. Some feel exhausted and are looking for a way to reduce the intensity.

Whichever camp you may be in, there is a strikingly simple way to make things easier, that I discovered and use all the time.

Self-talk can provide a huge assist

The frame of mind we choose, and the energy that is supported by our thinking, can result in very different experiences.

Consider these two ways to approach the same situation.

Scenario 1: 

This person sits down at her desk and looks over a huge list of things to do before the end of the day.

She says to herself, “This is going to be hard! It will take all day, and maybe into the evening, to get it done.”

She gets to work and pushes through the hours. She barely takes a break, and finds herself feeling irritable.

Scenario 2: 

Another person starts her day looking at a similar list.

She says to herself, “Wow, there’s a lot on this list! What if it does not have to be hard? What if it’s easy to get through these tasks? I have an abundance of time!”

She starts her work, feeling good about all she will accomplish. She moves from task to task, and takes a brief break each hour. She also makes sure to eat well mid-day.

Their outcomes

In Scenario 1, the day ends with a lot accomplished but she feels depleted. She gets home feeling weary and dreading more of the same for the rest of the week.

In Scenario 2, the day ends with a lot accomplished and she feels satisfied and eager to have a nice evening. She knows there is a lot to do the rest of the week, and knows she will approach each day with a similar orientation.

Turn around thoughts that make life harder

A good rule of thumb that will help you shift your self-talk to experience more ease and better outcomes is to turn around the thoughts that do not support you to bring your best energy to tasks at hand (and hamper your outcomes, too).

That’s right. You can reframe negative thoughts to be the opposite — thus turning them into in positive thoughts.

Our negative way of thinking is often on “automatic,” because we do it so regularly.

It’s easier to change those patterns than you may think.

Here are some examples. I’ll begin with a review of the common thoughts noted in the scenarios above.

1. “It‘s going to be hard.”

Most of us use this statement without considering its impact.

Here are a few ways this thinking can show up:
“Making our travel arrangements is going to be hard.”
“This will be a hard conversation.”
“It’s always hard to find the best solution to problems like this one.”

We set ourselves up for struggle when we think this way at the start.

By turning each around, we can feel positive, and maybe even look forward to the experience of making those travel arrangements or solving those problems. In the case of anticipating a “hard” conversation, a turnaround statement helps us defuse the heavy emotion and approach the conversation with more ease. This shift may even help you feel more confident.

2. “There’s not enough time.”

This is something I found myself saying nearly daily for years. One day, my coach looked at a full agenda of things we planned to get through in a day, and said, “There’s a lot here, and we have an abundance of time!”

Not only did her energy shift when she said that, mine did, too. We found that we moved through everything we intended, and really enjoyed the process.

I have been reminding myself that there is an abundance of time ever since, and it’s been a game-changer. My clients have loved adopting this approach, too.

3. “This is complicated.” 

Sure, some things are complex, but you can look at the same circumstances and say, “I can figure this out! It may not be so complicated.”

Can you envision how differently you will feel as you move ahead with this frame of mind?

4. “This is stressful.”

You might turn this statement around and tell yourself, “This is an interesting situation. It feels stressful, but it does not have to be.” 

What other negative thoughts can you notice, and start to turn around?

Start paying attention to your self-talk today

When you bring awareness to habitual ways of thinking that make your life harder, you are able to consciously make small (and significant) shifts in your thinking. Why not begin now?

If you try it, and see that day-to-day life becomes easier and more enjoyable, I would love to hear about what is working for you and the difference it’s making.

Leave a comment or email me me to let me know.

And now, I will return to my to-do list for the day. I know I have all the time I need to get through it!

Stay safe and well, and create your life with joy.

Looking for fresh inspiration? Check out these 3 big ideas.

The glory of spring is palpable, and getting most of us excited — excited to be outdoors in warmer temperatures, excited to see colors blooming, excited to begin to see people in person. I enjoyed a wonderful walk with a colleague on Friday afternoon, and look forward to more opportunities to see people, ideally outdoors.

Getting outside is one of many great ways to get inspired. We’ve been cooped up for so long, and while video calls have kept us connected, the chance to be together for real feels great.

How to create inspiration when it goes AWOL

No matter the time of year or the external constraints (the pandemic having been a huge one for the last two years), we all have times when we feel uninspired, or experience a dip in energy and enthusiasm.

When that happens, it can help to have a short cheat-sheet for ways to find a spark.

Here are three great ways to light up your spirits.

These approaches can build enthusiasm for a task at hand, get you excited about taking on a big new project, can help you overcome doubt, and can generally get you feeling more alive and excited.

1. Invite a great conversation

I often say that everything good happens in a conversation. Sure, email is great, and texting has its place, but an actual conversation offers so much more possibility.

And if that conversation happens in person, all the better! (The walk with my colleague on Friday was richer because we spent time together on a circuit around a gorgeous reservoir and had a far-reaching conversation.)

The key is to invite people who think positively, who are curious, maybe funny, and in whose company you feel happy.

2. Look for wonder

I wrote a chapter titled See Wonder, in my book.

Why?

Because wonder lights us up. It inspires us and connects us to our hearts. And most of us miss it as we rush through our days.

When we tune in to the wonder that is all around us — beauty in nature; a shadow created by light streaming through a window; the colors, textures and tastes of lovely food, for example — our outlook about everything is buoyed.

We all have a camera on hand! Why not look for wonder and capture that moment with the camera on your phone. You can pause to savor wonder in the moment, and reconnect to the wonder any time as you pursue the photos in your library.

3. Play!

I also wrote a chapter on Play in my book.

And, this topic is still a work-in progress for me. I think it is for many adults.

The more I have learned about play, the more impressed I am about the power that plays has for us. We can all benefit from returning to the power of play that most of us experienced as kids.

When we play things don’t feel so serious. Fear drops away. When we get silly and experiment, we stop worrying about mistakes and are more focused on possibilities. We are in the moment, present and excited.

When we play and feel joy, life feels expansive. We create with ease!

I know that the possibility of letting go to play with abandon can feel risky for some. Maybe you were “good at” play as a kid, and maybe not. At some point nearly all of us were told it was time to get serious, we played less, and we are out of practice.

Why not look for opportunities to bring play into your life, and practice it?

Inspiration fuels creativity

And creativity is the key to making the life you deeply desire a reality.

Life is precious. Each day counts.

When you stay inspired, when you are truly self-aware and focused, when you learn to bring all of your best self into the world and are able to navigate the inevitable challenges (big and small) as they show up, you can create an inspired, fulfilling life.

Many accomplished, thoughtful women want that life, and yet don’t know how to get there, or struggle to do it on their own.

Perhaps some of these thought have occurred to you:

I am ready to stop settling for less than what’s possible.
I feel there is something more I want to explore or do.
I know I am ready to take a bold step in my life, but I don’t know what it is.
I know it's time for me to stop living small.

If thoughts like these feel familiar, and you want to explore what is possible for you, let’s talk.

The Spring 2022 Live Big Live! program is kicking off soon. If you are ready to light up your spirit, get clear about your vision, and create an inspired future with intention, email me and we’ll see if this program is a fit for you.

Stay safe and well, and create your life with joy.

Don’t miss out on the subtle gifts of the season

There is no doubt that living through the pandemic for over 2 years has changed us. Even those fortunate enough to have remained healthy and working productively are realizing ways that they have been impacted.

Researchers are now sharing more insights about sleep interruption; mental health problems caused by isolation, grief and worry; stress associated with everything from economic changes to parenting children of every age; and physical challenges that include unusually early starts of menstruation, weight gain, lack of exercise, and the damage the body suffers from sitting for hours on end.

I am grateful that spring (which is just becoming evident here in New England) is here — on the calendar and in front of our eyes. With this new season we can approach our lives in many ways that will support our physical, emotional and mental wellbeing.

Spring offers many gifts

Most of us think about spring as a time of warmer temperatures, blooming flowers and trees, and the delight of being outdoors with ease.

And I am grateful for all of that!

There is also a deeper layer of opportunity and insight we can explore. We are more closely connected to the rhythms and energy of nature than many of us realize. There is an intelligence in nature we can tap into now.

We just lived through the season of winter and receptivity.

Nature inspired us to be more quiet and reflective, connecting to deep inner knowing. It was a time to dream and feel inspired to create visions for what we want.

Spring shifts us into the season of embodiment — and this is a time to focus on being.

We can focus on becoming the person who will activate the insights and visions of winter — and become energized to plant the seeds for all that we dreamed of creating.

When we are fully embodied, awakened and inspired, we can plant the seeds with care and tend to the seeds. Even when challenges appear (which is inevitable), we can keep our energy strong, stay focused, and bring loving devotion to the effort of nurturing what we aim to create.

How to embrace the energy of the season

When I embark on anything new — and I have a lot of new things I am planting seeds for now — I first aim to feel as inspired as possible. One thing that always opens my heart is seeing great art.

This weekend I went to the Museum of Fine Arts (for only the second time since the start of the pandemic). I chose to spend most of my time in galleries that were not crowded, and the gift was that I found incredible treasures. They provided wonderful inspiration.

A brisk walk near the museum offered a great wake-up for many muscle groups in my stiff body. And spotting early signs of color and plant growth lifted my spirits to even great heights.

While it was not on my plan for the day, when I got home I felt a huge desire to paint! I turned on my favorite music and three hours of creating flew by. New ideas came pouring in, too.

This positioned me to start the week filled with energy, brimming with big ideas, and feeling physically vibrant.

How will you make the most of the season?

Each day we have the opportunity to renew and bolster our energy, to support vibrant physical wellbeing and a strong spirit.

As you focus on who you are becoming in this season of growth, think about what seeds you feel called to plant now.

And think about how will you keep your energy strong, to tend to them over time.

Spend a few minutes focusing on what lights you up, opens your heart, inspires you. What opportunities are accessible to you, to excite you now?

Maybe you will pass on a museum visit and hop on your bike, or plan a social event with special friends in a gorgeous place, or try a new kind of yoga, or play an instrument, or start a dance party, or explore a scenic town.

I would love to hear what you choose, and what happens when you activate your energy to make the most of this glorious season. Leave a comment, or email me.

Stay safe and well, and create your life with joy.

The truth about forgiveness

Who among us hasn’t dealt with the issues of resentment and forgiveness?

When our feelings are hurt, it stings.

And when we experience more serious situations — where we feel deeply hurt or wronged — pain, resentment and anger are among the emotions that can grip us.

We can be upset about something that feels unjust that has happened to us.

We can be upset on behalf of someone about whom we care deeply.

We can even be upset on behalf of people we do not know, but for whom we feel tremendous empathy — such as a class of mistreated people, or those who are victims of cruelty.

How to cope with the pressure of resentment

Resentment brings on emotions that feel justified. If we keep them pent up, it often feels like tension is building inside, and that is an awful sensation.

But it does not have to be that way for long.

Allow yourself to feel all the emotion.

It’s important to acknowledge what you are feeling, and feel it all, without fear of the strong emotion. You can feel safe to feel it all if you don’t sit endlessly in the emotion and allow it to smolder or grow.

Here’s how to keep that from happening:

Give the emotion you feel an outlet.

You might journal about the anger or pain or bitterness you feel, or stomp it out on a walk in the woods.

Maybe you'll make a hideous picture of the anger, to wring the emotion out of your system.

Maybe you will turn up harsh music and dance out what is burdening you, until you feel spent.

Find what works for you, and know that any of these approaches will help free you of the emotional load of those heavy feelings.

Now you can consider forgiveness

Forgiving someone used to feel nearly impossible for me. It was not a problem for small slights or hurts, but when someone behaved in a way that had a deep negative impact for me, I was unable to imagine being able to forgive them.

This was modeled for me growing up. There were stories in my family about people who held onto grievances for years. And I witnessed some examples of that myself.

I wanted that division and bitterness to end, rather than continue to be a family trait. And yet, I personally struggled to be able to forgive. I could not forget what felt so painful, so how could I forgive?

At that time, I did not have tools or insights to help me, as I do now. Pain and resentment and bitterness lingered and festered, before I learned the ways to release the negative energy that I described above.

And then I learned more about forgiveness.

I learned that when when I felt unable to forgive, I was primarily hurting myself. That was a huge insight for me.

And when a wise person told me it was not necessary to forget in order to be able to forgive — and that I did need to excuse the person for the matter that hurt so much — the doors to healing opened for me.

I made the choice to forgive.

I realized that the prolonged suffering — that I felt, and that the other party apparently felt — was doing nothing to rectify the issue that set the chain of pain in motion.

I did not ask for or feel the need for an apology, or any acknowledgement.

I simply moved forward with love. I said I was putting the past behind me and asked if the other party wanted to move forward that way.

I am so glad the answer was yes. And I continue to be deeply grateful that I learned this lesson when I did.

We can all step into the light

I wish I could say that I’ve never needed to forgive since that day. That is hardly the case.

I find myself faced with matters from time to time that call on me to feel and release pain and hurt, and then forgive.

Sometimes I address the matter directly, as happened years back. Sometimes I make a private decision to forgive and move forward.

In both situations, I make the choice to live with love as my guiding force — for myself and the party I forgive.

I envision myself standing in the light of that love, at the highest energetic vibration I can feel. That energy keeps me moving forward, free from the weight of pain or resentment.

I believe that in time (and sometimes it takes more time than others), the love and the light I feel will be felt by the person I send it to.

So far, the evidence has been clear, and I trust that as I continue to forgive with love, I will see the same outcomes.

Are you ready to give yourself this gift?

If you are holding any bitterness in your heart, I invite you to explore the practice of letting yourself feel it with awareness, and then experiment with ways to release the emotion, to give yourself a sense of palpable relief.

You may need to do this more than once to feel better. That’s fine! You will know when you feel ready to consider the next step, forgiveness.

To begin to forgive, you might simply send loving thoughts toward the person you have been upset with.

You might suggest a conversation to declare that you want to move ahead with a fresh start, and ask if they want that as well.

If that feels like too big a step to take, you might send an email and not mention anything about the old issue. You can simply suggest spending time together doing something pleasant, and see if they want to join you. Even if it takes time, you can continue to make invitations like that.

In time, you may get a “Yes.”

And until that time, you will feel lighter, and free from the burden of resentment.

That is a fabulous gift.

Stay safe and well, and create with joy.

Love doesn’t have to be complicated

Yesterday was Valentine’s Day. Maybe you (like me) are feeling tired of the way the focus on love feels commercialized, manipulative and superficial in our culture.

Perhaps you are cynical about love, or feel it is missing or lacking in your life, or you doubt its importance.

Perhaps you crave more love, in any of the ways it can touch your heart.

What if you simply let yourself feel love?

We spend so much time living in our heads.

It’s when we choose not to think so much and drop into our hearts and our bodies, that we have the opportunity to get to the pure essence of love, and experience it in ways that fill us with delight.

Try this simple practice and see what happens:

Spend 3 minutes of quiet and connect to your heart.

You might set a timer, or just choose to sit in stillness for a little while.

Cross your hands over your heart. As you breathe, feel into the energy of your heart.

Pay attention to the sensations you feel.

Ask what your heart desires.

Listen closely.

Even if you hear only whispers, the information and insights are important to honor. And if you feel an absence of insight, try sitting a bit longer. Or try again later or tomorrow.

Next — no matter what you found — actively appreciate yourself. Send love to you, for being with yourself this way, and for being the amazing person you are.

Savor the sweetness of this experience.

This process is a way you can experience and cultivate self-love. Even if it feels subtle, it can be more powerful than you may imagine.

And the more you make this practice a part of your life, the bigger the benefits will be.

Consider expanding your self-love practice.

Gaze at yourself in the mirror each morning and smile warmly at you!

Focus on treating yourself to experiences that delight you. You deserve them.

Maybe a brisk walk each morning makes you feel alive and excited for your day. Make that a priority!

Maybe preparing clean healthy foods makes you feel great. Plan your day so there is ample time for that preparation, as well as savoring the food you cook.

Maybe adding a new color to your environment will lift your spirits each day. How can you bring in a splash of that color, perhaps with a throw pillow, or by painting an accent wall in a space you use a lot? Maybe you will choose to wear that color more.

Maybe visiting galleries or museums lights you up, or music stirs your heart. Make inspiration dates to bring joy like that into your life.

You will effortlessly begin to spread more love.

When we are filled with love for ourselves we can spread love to others with ease and joy. We naturally feel more affection and connection to everyone around us.

The expression of this loving energy can show up as smiling more at people (even strangers), expressing appreciation, and engaging in small acts of kindness.

And, at times when you might have typically felt annoyed or frustrated or angry with someone (friends or strangers), you may instead find yourself able to send them loving thoughts, or wanting to give them the benefit of the doubt.

When you spread loving energy — even wordlessly — you support your own wellbeing, and often shift the energy in the person or people around you in ways you cannot perceive.

The power of love can change your life.

Last week I was honored to lead a remarkable group of women for three days of deep work, infused by love, at my winter Live Big Live! retreat.

We began the journey 45 days before the retreat. We came together and dove deep into shaping visions for the future that were rooted in knowing that comes from a deep connection to the heart.

Love was the foundation for everything we did. Love infused each experience included in the program, that culminated in so many big outcomes.

Each woman connected to ways to cultivate self-love that had deep meaning for her. They each unabashedly honored themselves and their gifts, and claimed the desires in their hearts. They were able to step into honoring those desires, and begin to take concrete steps to make them their reality.

Shifts like this cannot happen in an instant. Practice is needed, and over the weeks and at the retreat, we practiced together.

With a foundation of self-love, each of the women naturally supported the others with tremendous love. The energetic connections were palpable and powerful.

Even without deep immersion and guidance, you can bring the power of love into your life in bigger ways than ever.

I invite you to start with the practice described above, and expand it as you feel inspired.

You will reap beautiful rewards.

If you wish to share your experience, or have questions, I would be happy to hear from you.

Email me to let me know how this resonates for you.

Stay safe and well, and create with joy.