How to make 1 life-changing change

Most of us go through familiar motions each day. After all, as humans we are creatures of habit and we don’t give much thought to our ingrained patterns. 

Some of our habits are fine, and many may be terrific. But most people who pause to think about it, realize that there are some ways they live day by day that are dissatisfying, if not problematic.

For some, the tiny device they carry all day is a huge distraction, and for many it serves as a seductive way to avoid doing things they want, or mean, or need to do. (There are variations on this theme, too, like indulging in Netflix binges, or scrubbing at the grout in the shower.)

For some, living in overdrive is habitual and exhaustion is the norm. They cannot remember how to get quiet and relax.

For others, worry is a habit.

Some overeat or drink as a way to numb themselves when they feel discomfort.

Some deplete themselves by always taking care of, and trying to please, everyone around them.

You can choose to cultivate new ways of being

You may be familiar with the idea of committing to a “practice” in your life. If not, you may have heard people refer to their yoga practice, or a meditation practice, or a self-care practice, or some other kind of practice.

Starting a practice is an excellent way to change habits that hinder you.

When I first heard the term “practice” years back, I found it curious — and I thought it was a bit pretentious. I now understand the concept of having a practice, and how meaningful and helpful it is.

When I decided to attend yoga classes, and found a teacher and classmates that felt like “home” for me, I began to understand what it means to have a practice in your life. I regularly attended classes and found yoga to be an important part of my life.

When you choose to adopt a practice, you commit to doing something new or different with ongoing focus and regularity.

What it looks like to adopt a practice

Yoga is a good form of exercise, but yoga is really about more than simply mastering physical poses. By choosing to have a yoga practice, you commit. Each time you get on the mat you learn more about how your body works, you slowly cultivate balance, you experience more flexibility and strength, you breath with intention. And as you do all of that, you become fully present to your body. You experience what it feels like to empty your mind and be only in the present.

You do not gain all of these benefits in a week. It is when you sustain a yoga practice that the benefits grow and become greater over time.

Adopting a sustained practice of any kind works the same way.

Your new practice — which can be establishing new guidelines for interacting with your smartphone, or new ways of cooking and eating, or creating a schedule for your days that matches your peak energy periods, or building regular movement into your life — will impact the way you show up in your life.

It will help you to be the person you want to be.

Who you want to be to live your best life?

Why not stop and consider who you want to be, and who you need to be, to live the life you truly yearn for? Asking yourself may help you identify a range of ways you want to commit to bringing new practices into your life.

You may want to learn to slow down and be still — and enjoy that stillness.

You may want to start living in the present moment, rather than replaying old experiences, reliving regrets, or pushing your thoughts out to what-ifs in the future.

You may want to feel more free and willing to experiment, play and try new ideas, rather than holding back until you feel certain of outcomes.

You may want to dive into an interest that you’ve been drawn to but have not pursued, for fear you won’t be good enough, or that others might criticize you.

Use these 3 steps to get started

A word of caution: Don’t slip into the trap of making lots of changes at once. That’s never wise. And, avoid getting overwhelmed by ruminating over all the possibilities for what one change to make.

These steps can guide your process:

1. Start by asking yourself this question:

What one new way of being do I feel most eager to adopt now?

Let your intuition chime in here, and trust it. You do not need to make a “perfect” choice — simply make a choice!

2. Next, consider what small new practice you can commit to that will help you to adopt that new way of being.

Find some uninterrupted time and brainstorm about this. (The Discovery Dozen™ exercise, that I teach in my book, can be a great resource for exploring possibilities.)

Having generated a list of ideas, what feels the most appealing? Aim to create a small new practice that you believe you can commit to.

3. Now it’s time to put the new practice into action.

Get started! Make adjustments if you find that something does not work so well, or shift to new variations if needed, but keep going.

Once you have landed on the way your new practice works for you, and you stay with it (even if it takes some getting used to at first), you will be on your way to becoming the person you want to be now.

And be sure to acknowledge and celebrate yourself after taking each of these steps. 

What’s next?

When you have a new practice comfortably in place, you will find that you can consider adding another new practice.

This is how we grow and expand in our lives.

This is how you can live big.

If you would like to talk about the future you want to create, and who you need to become to create that life, I invite you to schedule a Live Big Breakthrough Call with me.

I’ll help you gain insight and clarity about what you want, what changes you are seeking to make, and what may be limiting you. 

I look forward to hearing from you.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

What are you waiting for?

Each day we awake with a fundamental choice.

We can choose to go through the day much like all other days. Entrenched habits and patterns can rule us.
This leads to reacting to everything that comes along. And tolerating frustrations or relationships or jobs that drain us. And to struggling to make time for self-care, not to mention things that bring joy.

Or, you can choose a different option.

You can start each day with the energy of a creator — deliberating considering what you want to create in your life, and actively creating when you move through your days.

What does it look like to embrace the energy of a creator?

When you embrace yourself as a creator, you look at the way you have been living and decide what is working well and where you are frustrated — or are tolerating things that don't work well.

This is what can happen.

You can choose to make positive changes, like showing up as your authentic self, both at work and with people in your personal sphere.

You can learn to listen to your intuition — and trust it.

You can begin to live boldly, and play more, and not let fear or doubt stop you.

Learning to live this way means stepping up in new ways. It means being willing to make commitments to yourself to take action, to shift from living on auto-pilot.

And while it means being willing to step into some discomfort, it means trusting that you are capable of doing this work, and willing to ask for support. And it means you want to be accountable to staying on the path of positive change.

Or, you can wait.

You can wait for certainly.
You can wait for permission.
You can wait for confidence.
You can wait for magic (sometimes in the form of someone who will come to the rescue or someone to do the work for you).
You can wait for complete clarity about what you want, or what to do next, or the exact destination.

Are you content to wait, or are you ready to take action to live a life that makes you excited to wake up to each new day?

This is your decision point. You get to choose.

This can be the day you say “Yes!” to yourself and a bigger future.

If you are ready to know more about what it can look like to become a true creator in your life, drop me a note.

We’ll schedule a time to talk — no obligation, no sales pitch. Just an opportunity for me to hear about your challenges and the dreams you have for a more fulfilled life, and for you to hear about what it takes to become the creator of that future.

I can promise that this conversation will provide you with big insights and a lot of inspiration.

Scheduling this call will be a meaningful action step.

Do you want to take it?

Endings and beginnings

Here we are in mid-December. As we count down the last weeks of the year, and before we get to New Year's Eve resolution-making, it's a perfect time to think about what you want to STOP doing in order to open up space to create in big and new ways in the coming year.

What will be your big YES? What have you been wanting, or trying, or yearning to do but not been able to make it a reality or bring it into full flower? What is calling for your attention and exploration?

Has something gotten in your way of going after this big desire? Have you been pulled in too many directions? Have you avoided really going for it out of fear or doubt? These are big and important questions to ask yourself. And, this an excellent time to give yourself space to getting clear about what has been getting in your way.

Consider what changes you can make that will make space for focused action to fully realize your big YES for the new year. They may be small changes, like starting your day in a new way, or getting more sleep so you have more energy. You may realize you need to become more alert to things like not getting sucked in to long conversations that drain you, or not letting yourself go down social media rabbit holes. Making small changes can have a big impact.

And, be aware that to say "YES" to something important you want to realize in your life, you must be ready to say "NO" — a lot. In addition to saying "no" to things and habits that you want to shift away from, you will find that you have to say "NO" to interesting ideas that will pop up, or opportunities that will come your way. As interesting as they are, they will distract you from your big YES. A big YES demands time and attention to become a reality. It's not always easy to say "No" to great things, but when you are really clear and committed to your "yes,” you'll find you can more easily say "no.”

Take a little time during the last days of the year to ponder these ideas. You may want to do some journal writing to explore these questions. You can talk about your ideas with a trusted friend, or consider partnering with a friend so you can support one another to do this important thinking and planning.

Wishing you a new year of clarity and focus. I'd love to hear about your big YES and how you are going for it!